Separation is a strange, in-between time. You are still legally married, but your household is coming apart. For families in New Braunfels and across Comal County, the months between deciding to divorce and getting a final decree are often when the costliest mistakes happen, usually out of fear, anger or simple exhaustion. This guide lists the missteps a family law attorney sees most often and suggests what to do instead.
A note before we start: Texas does not have “legal separation.” Until a judge signs your divorce decree, you are married in the eyes of the law. Several of the points below follow from that fact. Our page on separation in Texas explains it in more detail.
Money Mistakes
Don’t Empty the Joint Accounts
It is tempting to grab money “before they do.” Large, unexplained withdrawals tend to look bad to a judge, and Texas courts can consider waste or fraud on the community when dividing property. If you need funds to live on, take a reasonable amount, keep a record of how you used it and tell your lawyer.
Instead: Open an individual account for your own paycheck going forward, keep a ledger of any joint funds you use and ask about temporary orders if bills are going unpaid.
Don’t Run Up Debt or Make Big Purchases
A new truck, a boat for Canyon Lake or a pile of credit card charges during separation can all come back to haunt you. A court can account for spending that reduced the community estate.
Instead: Hold off on major financial moves until your case is resolved or you have spoken with a lawyer.
Don’t Hide or Transfer Assets
Moving money to a relative, “selling” a vehicle to a friend for a dollar or failing to disclose an account is one of the fastest ways to lose credibility with a court. Texas law gives judges tools to address fraud on the community, including awarding a larger share to the wronged spouse.
Instead: Disclose everything, even items you believe are your separate property. Claiming something as separate is done openly, with proof.
Don’t Stop Paying Shared Bills Without a Plan
Cutting off the mortgage, utilities or car insurance to pressure a spouse can damage both spouses’ credit and anger the judge who will decide your case.
Instead: If you cannot keep paying, discuss a written interim agreement or temporary orders. Our guide to protecting your finances covers this in more depth.
Communication Mistakes
Don’t Send Messages You Wouldn’t Want Read Aloud
Texts, emails and voicemails are routinely offered as evidence in Texas family courts. A message sent at midnight in anger can be read in a courtroom months later, stripped of all context.
Instead: Keep communication short, factual and focused on logistics. If something makes you furious, wait until morning to answer.
Don’t Vent on Social Media
Posts, comments, check-ins and photos are among the most common pieces of evidence in contested cases. Even “private” accounts are not private when a mutual friend takes a screenshot.
Instead: Step back from posting until the case is over. See our full guide on social media and divorce.
Don’t Record or Snoop Unlawfully
Logging into your spouse’s email, installing tracking apps or reading their private messages without permission can expose you to civil or criminal liability and may make the evidence unusable.
Instead: Tell your lawyer what you suspect. Formal discovery is the proper way to get information.
Parenting Mistakes
Don’t Put the Children in the Middle
Asking a child to pass messages, report on the other parent or choose sides causes real harm. Judges in Comal County, like judges everywhere in Texas, decide parenting issues based on the child’s best interest, and they pay close attention to which parent protects the child from conflict.
Instead: Communicate with the other parent directly or through a co-parenting app. Our co-parenting guide has practical tools.
Don’t Badmouth the Other Parent
Negative comments about the other parent, even subtle ones, hurt children and can be raised in court. Texas courts consider each parent’s willingness to support the child’s relationship with the other parent.
Instead: Save your frustrations for a friend, counselor or your lawyer.
Don’t Withhold the Children
Refusing to let the other parent see the children, without a safety reason, can seriously damage your case. If there is no order in place yet, the best approach is a reasonable informal schedule, ideally in writing, until temporary orders are entered.
Instead: If you have genuine safety concerns, talk to a lawyer about protective orders or supervised visitation rather than acting on your own.
Don’t Move Away With the Kids
A sudden move to San Antonio, Austin or out of state with the children can look like an attempt to gain the upper hand. Many Texas orders include a geographic restriction once entered, and moving before an order exists can still affect how a judge views you.
Instead: If you need to relocate for work or family support, plan it with your lawyer. See our page on relocation.
Living-Arrangement Mistakes
Don’t Move Out Without Thinking It Through
Moving out does not forfeit your share of the house, but it can change the day-to-day parenting picture, especially if the children stay behind. Once a pattern is established, it can be hard to undo.
Instead: Get advice before you move, and if you do leave, stay closely involved in the children’s routine.
Don’t Move a New Partner In
A new partner living in the home, especially with children present, can become a central issue in a custody dispute and may affect property arguments.
Instead: Keep new relationships separate from your children and your household until the divorce is final.
Legal and Paperwork Mistakes
Don’t Ignore Papers or Deadlines
If you are served with a petition, there is a deadline to file an answer. Missing it can lead to a default divorce entered without your input.
Instead: Call a lawyer as soon as you are served.
Don’t Sign Anything You Don’t Understand
A spouse may present a “simple agreement” that quietly gives away retirement funds, the house or parenting rights. Once signed and approved by the court, these agreements can be very difficult to undo.
Instead: Have any proposed agreement reviewed before you sign.
Don’t Change Beneficiaries or Cancel Insurance on Your Own
Removing a spouse from health insurance or changing life insurance beneficiaries during a pending case may violate a standing order and can create unexpected problems.
Instead: Ask before you make changes to insurance or estate planning documents.
A Quick Reference
| Instead of this | Try this |
|---|---|
| Draining the joint account | Taking a reasonable, documented amount |
| Angry late-night texts | Short, factual messages the next morning |
| Posting about the divorce | A social media pause |
| Keeping the kids from the other parent | A written temporary schedule |
| Signing your spouse’s draft agreement | Having it reviewed first |
Get Guidance From a New Braunfels Family Law Attorney
Separation is hard enough without accidental damage to your case. If you are separated or about to be, our family law team can help you set a steady course. Call (830) 302-4071 for a free consultation with New Braunfels Family Law. We serve Comal County and the surrounding counties, and we speak Spanish.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is it adultery if I date while separated in Texas?
Texas has no legal status of separation, so you remain married until the decree is signed. A new relationship before then can be treated as adultery, which a court may consider in dividing property. It can also become an issue in parenting decisions.
Can I change the locks if my spouse moved out?
If the home is community property, your spouse may still have a legal right to enter. Changing the locks without a court order or agreement can create conflict and may violate a standing order. Talk with a lawyer about temporary orders if you need exclusive use.
Can I take the kids to stay with my parents in another town?
Moving the children away without agreement or a court order can backfire badly and may violate a standing order that applies once a case is filed. Even before filing, a judge may view it as an attempt to gain an advantage.
What if my spouse is already doing these things?
Keep calm records of what happens, with dates. Do not retaliate in kind. A lawyer can ask the court for temporary orders or other relief, and a well-documented pattern is often more persuasive than an angry response.
Last reviewed November 13, 2026. General information only, not legal advice.